"We'll Be Afraid Together"

As my students can well attest, Little House on the Prairie is by far my favorite TV show ever! One of my favorite sayings – and no doubt their least favorite – is, “There’s a Little House episode for that!” Sibling rivalry: “Fagin.” Dealing with bullies: “The Bullies” and “The Werewolf of Walnut Grove.” Prejudice: “The Barn Burner.” A modern version of a Shakespeare classic: “He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not,” when Percival takes on the Taming of the Shrew and Nellie Oleson actually becomes nice! One of my favorite episodes from the earlier seasons is “The Hunters.”

Laura finagles her way onto a camping trip with Pa. Mr. Edwards drops them off hours from town and they walk most of a day before they stop for the night. They pass a trapper’s cabin where an old blind man lives with his son, and in a side story, we learn the old man, Mr. Shelby, hasn’t left his house or yard in ten years because of his blindness. He’s afraid, and his son is at his wits’ end. Pa is accidentally shot and Laura has to go back to that cabin for help. But the son has gone to check his traps, and only the old man is there to help. It isn’t far, and he goes with Laura to bring the wounded Pa back to the cabin, but when the son has not yet returned a day later and Pa is in need of medical attention, he is reluctant to go with Laura to meet up with Mr. Edwards.

Laura wants him to go with her, because she doesn’t know the way. But Mr. Shelby is too afraid. “There’s mountains and valleys and ridges and rocks and creeks and all manner of things out there. And I’m afeared, child, I’m afeared.”

“Then we’ll be afraid together.”

She does not berate him: “What kind of a man are you, to let a man bleed to death in your house?” She does not patronize: “Oh, I know it will be difficult, but you can do it!” She does not wheedle or beg.

Just simple acknowledgment: “Then we’ll be afraid together.”

They set out, and several times they seem lost. Once, climbing a wooded hill, he refuses to move, and Laura, quite cruelly it seems, steps away from him and refuses to speak, leaving him in a dark hell, alone with his fear, until finally she says, “I can’t make it to the road head without you, and you can’t go back without me, and I’m not going back!” And so he goes on. Another time she is crying and wants to give up, and he reverses it: “You can’t go forward without me, and I can’t go back without you, and I’m not going back!” Of course, they reach Mr. Edwards and the doctor comes and Pa is saved, and it’s only what we expect. (The only truly, unequivocally sad episode in all nine years is a two part-er called “To Make Them Proud,” in which Mary and Adam’s baby and Alice Garvey are killed in a fire. But that’s another blog.)

There are two lessons learned in “The Hunters.” The first, of course, is that we can all push ourselves to try what seems difficult, impossible, or frightening. I’ve had to come to grips with this reality as my body disintegrates from arthritis and its attendant pain and fatigue. I like the concept of “the spoons,” which explains that all activities use up spoons in our daily allotment of spoons. For most people, most tasks take up one or two spoons, and a fifteen minute catnap or a coffee will restore some spoons to you. For those with chronic illness, something as simple as getting dressed may use up two spoons and grocery shopping can easily use four and you only have ten to start with and you’ll be lucky if eight hours of sleep will restore all ten. When the day’s allotment is used up, the day is effectively over. Some days a list of tasks feels like the hike up mountains and down valleys and over ridges and through creeks and I’m afeared, afeared and weary and just done. Afraid the rest of my life will be like this, and worse. Weary because it is always like this, and worse. And just done, ready to sit on a rock and give up.

And as Laura’s calm statement points out, it’s OK to be afraid. And weary, and ready to give up.

But Laura doesn’t give up, and neither does Mr. Shelby. Because neither of them is alone. That is the second lesson to be learned here. I am weariest when I try to carry my burden alone. Sometimes going to the grocery store is just too much. Sometimes I live on cereal because a box will last awhile and I can always go through the drive-thru at a purple and orange coffee shop or at golden arches and get a small bottle of milk. Yes, I pay dearly for it, but it is not only preferable, sometimes it is the only option.

But it is not the only option; I could call on my dear friends, who are more than willing to swing by on their way home and pick something up for me.

We are not meant to live this life and walk through this life alone. God created us for fellowship, first with Himself, but also with each other. Didn’t He look at Adam and say, “It is not good for man to be alone”? Moses had Aaron, and then Joshua. David had Johnathan, and then he took care of Mephibosheth, who was crippled and had no way to care for himself. Daniel and his three friends; Elijah and Elisha; Jesus and His disciples; Paul and Silas; Paul and Barnabas. And we have each other.

“Let us hold fast the confession of our faith without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.” Hebrews 10: 23-25.